ef – a tale of memories: Amazing anime, horrendous title. They might as well have named the show please ignore me: the animation. At least please ignore me: the animation trumpets the X-factor of reverse psychology. ef – a tale of memories is just plain worthless. Great titles, like EF – A Tale of Lesbians, grab you by the balls and never let go.
1. Use Capital Letters
Who do you think you’re trying to impress by going lowercase? Subtlety blows. I attribute all my success to large fonts, bold colors, and full-size pictures. They’ve made this site so popular that Google’s server crashed and assigned me a page rank of zero.
Caps make you look confident in your product. Lowercase says “warning: i suck.” Just follow the conventions of standard English and you’ll be fine:
- Capitalize EF (It’s the first part of the title and looks stupid in lower case)
- Capitalize all the nouns (Tale and Memories)
- Capitalize the ‘A’ (not required but looks better because it’s the first part of a subtitle)
Now let’s take an undeniably badass title and see how dumb it looks decapitalized:
the swooping descent of the dark emissary! the propagation of malice.
2. Replace Memories with Lesbians
3. Change the pronunciation of “ef”
Think it’s pronounced like the manly, high-octane E.F.? No, it’s pronounced like the soft, fluffy eff. Sounds like hopscotch and tea parties. E.F. has several advantages:
- It could be the initials of a lesbian
- It could be the initials of two lesbians
It’s mind-boggling how a show with such great writing could have such a crappy title. They picked an awesome name for the bank:
Why can’t American banks have slick names with relevant logos? We have a bank, I shit you not, called Fifth Third Bank. No wonder we’re in a recession. Then there’s PNC. Guess what it stands for? That’s right: PNC. It’s embarrassing that Japan, despite its long history of mangling English, is coming up with better names than us.
Until they change their title, I’ve decided to boycott ef – a tale of memories. Civil disobedience kicks ass. From now on it’s EF – A Tale of Lesbians.
EF – A Tale of Lesbians is the best drama I’ve ever seen. I clapped at the end. It’s so good that I may have to do away with the video game rule, which weights my standard of criticism based on the show’s original medium. For example, I suddenly got critical of Shakugan no Shana when I found out it wasn’t based off a video game. Here’s my current criticism ranking, starting with the strictest:
- Anime remake
- Light novel
- Original concept
- Video game
EF – A Tale of Lesbians is supposedly based off a game. What the hell? Aren’t video game adaptations supposed to suck?