Kure-nai: Crappy Plot, Crappy Show

I tried to be reasonable. I tried to be delicate. I tried to make a serious point with class and grace. What did it get me? A ton of inane comments ignoring all my arguments and reiterating the same hollow crap: Kure-nai is awesome and Plot doesn’t matter.

The only one who didn’t whore himself to this orgy of ignorance was good old reliable Keke (korosora and blissmo came too late). To reward Keke’s loyalty, I entrusted him with the duty of whipping peasants who fail to bow during my processions.

Now there’s no holding back. I’m bashing everything Kure-nai has to offer. I’m chewing it up and spitting it out. I’m comparing it to Kanokon. If you love Kure-nai, I will make you puke. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

1. The Plot is Crap

The next dumbass who says Plot doesn’t matter gets maced by Keke.

I understand that this is fiction. Some level of deference must be awarded to the creators, but you need to draw the line where stupidity eclipses plausibility. Does Kure-nai’s plot make any sense? You be the judge:

  1. A “dispute mediator” helps a little girl escape the household of her powerful plutocratic family.
  2. The mediator assigns the girl to live with her weakest, poorest, youngest subordinate, and she justifies her decision with nothing more than a hunch.
  3. They make no attempt to disguise the girl whatsoever.
  4. The subordinate has to go to school, leaving the girl unsupervised for most of the day.
  5. The girl wanders outside all the time, often alone. The mediator doesn’t care. In fact, she expressly allows it.
  6. She gets caught. Duh.

Nobody gives a shit if the girl sings and dances with her neighbors. She shouldn’t be living there in the first place. Send her to a guy who isn’t stupid enough to leave his doors unlocked. If he has a bathroom in his apartment, great, the girl will never have to expose herself in public every day to take a bath. If she has to go out, give her a wig. Holy shit, I should be a dispute mediator.

2. The Characters are Crap

The only decent character is the lady who stands guard outside the love hotel. Everyone else is worthless:

Murasaki: This prissy little bitch is exactly what I was talking about when I said that most anime girls don’t act their age. I don’t want to hear a little girl spewing bullshit relationship advice. I don’t want to hear her wishing for big breasts to please her man. I just don’t want to hear her, period.

Kurenai: Can’t fight. Sure, in some scenes he’s ok. Then in the next scene he just stands there, lets a guy punch him, and responds with a clinch. A little advice for Kurenai: street fights don’t play by the Marquess of Queensberry boxing rules.

Benika: She thinks she’s the fucking Delphi Oracle. Leaving the girl with your least capable subordinate based on nothing more than a hunch? Give me a break. For my 6th grade English class I wrote story about a guy who found a magical box due to a hunch. My teacher said it sucked. Should Kure-nai be held to a lower standard than my 6th grade English papers?

The classmate girls: Sluts.

The neighbors: Sluts.

3. The Dialogue is Crap

Three people talking at the same time – so fucking clever. Why don’t we see that more often? Oh yeah, because it’s irritating. Makes me want to throw porcupines at my neighbor.

A typical scene goes something like this:

Neighbor #1: Am I a good woman?

Murasaki: Yes, you’re a good woman.

Neighbor #1: But I’m actually a cheap slut who wantonly deceives men.

Murasaki: I think you’re a good woman on the inside.

Neighbor #2: Men are like Macs and Woman are like PCs: Men work.

After hearing the Kure-nai’s high-tech relationship analogy, I immediately looked up the show’s original creator and confirmed that he was a man, making all this good woman gossip/relationship philosophy from a female perspective conjectural bullshit. However, he did nail the point about how women can’t stop talking about themselves.

UPDATE:

Maybe the plot isn’t so bad after all…

Episode 9 just FUBAR’ed any hope of a decent plot: [spoiler]

After Kurenai and Murasaki escape, Kurenai wants to go back to their apartment, the most dangerous place they could possibly be, just so Murasaki can properly say goodbye to their neighbors. They meet up with the neighbors and have dinner, but despite the perfect opportunity, Murasaki never says goodbye (in fact, she implies that she won’t be going anywhere). Kurenai just stood there smiling. Then Kurenai and Murasaki take some time to pack clothes and make out. Finally, Murasaki gets caught and Kurenai gets his ass kicked, again.

[/spoiler]

At least Shin gets his sluts and lolis: [spoiler]

[/spoiler]

Tags:

39 people love sucking up to me

  1. Valen says:

    I have to say that you are right about the plot in this show. The entire “keeping a girl in hiding but not disguising her and letting her go anywhere she wants to” bit is hard to swallow, but I cant help but love the show. I love the character interactions and the dialogue is also excellent (I didnt have any problems with three people talking at the same time).

  2. Teeif says:

    But BR!

    Where’s my Kanokon comparison? I was expecting something along the lines of:
    Breasts: Kurenai 1, Kanokon 5.
    Sluts: Kurenai 3, Kanonkon 5.
    Plot: Kurenai 1, Kanokon -9001.

  3. CCY says:

    Plot doesn’t matter. (see: slice-of-life shows)

    Although, I do agree that Kure-nai’s plot is convoluted and silly (see: your last post on Kure-nai, how not to hide a person), even if this post isn’t serious at all. I laughed at your dialogue, as well.

    You forgot to call everyone who likes Kure-nai a lolicon, though.

  4. CCY says:

    And @Teeif: I think I am going to have to make a joke post about ‘Kanonkon’ at some point now. The possibilities simply boggle the mind. And make me reach for the mind bleach.

  5. Baka-Raptor says:

    @Valen: Maybe I’d agree with you in a normal post, but this a spiteful revenge post, so you’re wrong.

    @Teeif: Merely mentioning Kanokon is insulting enough. And I’m curious about the meaning of these odd-number breasts…

    @CCY: Calling anyone who disagrees with me a pedophile is a trademark of my site, but Benika…she’s a good woman, if you know what I mean.

  6. DrmChsr0 says:

    -9000/10.

    Trolling is way too obvious. :P

  7. Baka-Raptor says:

    @DrmChsr0: Gee, I wonder what gave it away. Was it the dino pic? Or perhaps it was my previous post (which I linked to). Or maybe it was my previous comment that called this a “spiteful revenge post.” Maybe it was my entire introductory section. I’ll try to be more subtle next time. :(

    But all my arguments are bulletproof. The plot is stupid, the characters can’t get their shit straight, and the dialogue is overplayed.

  8. Shin says:

    You’ve nailed what I liked about it though. Lolis and sluts.

  9. Keke says:

    I hold the Mace Of Ingorance with honor My lord BR.

    I have to say, I haven’t seen an episode of kure-nai, but if BR says it sucks, then it without a doubt sucks and I will go with that.

  10. ExiledShinobi says:

    I tried watching the first episode, got bored and stopped.

    Look like I made the right choice.

  11. digitalboy says:

    Sound to me like your mad that Kurenai is loved when your paper was tossed aside and laughed at. Jealous bitch :p

  12. Viktor Berg says:

    Ahaha, nice one, BR.

    BTW, I seem to be the only one who didn’t watch this show on this website. Still, what do I care? I’ve got Mechanics exam this monday, no time to dick around and watch anime.

  13. Maddox says:

    Hey Jackass be4 u go 2 criti-size an anime that is teh awesome, lern how 2 speel ‘INSANE’ LOL

  14. Baka-Raptor says:

    @Shin: If you like lolis and sluts, you’ll love episode 09.

    @Keke & ExiledShinobi: Don’t get me wrong, I never said that the show sucked.

    @digitalboy: Thank you, Dr. Digitalboy, for psychoanalyzing my childhood. My paper kicked ass. It was full of violence and Italian mafia stereotypes (the mafia stole my magic box).

    @Viktor: You know what’s a great way to review for Mechanics? Watching Ippatsu Kikimusume.

    @Maddox: you are are a judgemental son of a bithc who are you to jugde people you hipocrit!!!

  15. blissmo says:

    I CAME TOOOO LATE?!!!!!!!!!!

    Damn you …. and damn me ….

    but your sketch is adorable as always :D

    I almost agreed with everything you wrote, except I really like Murasaki

  16. Baka-Raptor says:

    @blissmo: Thank you for agreeing that I should throw porcupines at my neighbor. You’ll get your picture someday.

  17. Os says:

    I knew it. So my hunches were correct after all. I never watched past the first episode despite everyone saying I should. The real winner is me because you had to watch more of it.

  18. Baka-Raptor says:

    @Os (and everyone else): In all fairness, Kure-nai is the second best show I’ve been watching this season. First is Maid Guy, and third is Soul Eater, which may move up to second any episode.

  19. digitalboy says:

    Os: I can’t even begin to describe the out you are missing. Kure-nai is prtty much the only show I really care about this season (liking others, but none are favorite show material like this).

    Currently filming a 1-man performance of the musical, btw.

  20. Baka-Raptor says:

    @Os: How about pulling some strings for me? Your buddies back at Heterochromia are looking to add some new blogs to their blogroll…cough, cough…

  21. Owen S says:

    C+ trolling; a + for effort, and a C because you managed to make people agree with you in the comments (otherwise it’d be a D).

  22. Baka-Raptor says:

    @Owen S: People agree with me because arguments are bulletproof. I don’t know why you and DrmChsr0 think I’m trolling. Maybe it takes one to know one :)

  23. issa-sa says:

    Ippatsu Kikimusume!!!
    I totally forgot if I meant to agree or disagree with this post now. Well wtv *goes to watch Kurenai ep9*

  24. mt-i says:

    I understand that a serious reply will only make you score a few extra trolling points, but ah well. The point of exfiltrating Murasaki out of the Oku-no-in was not to hide her from her family at all costs, but to let her see the outside world and experience real life. Keeping her in custody behind closed doors would hardly accomplish that. I can’t say I don’t have issues with the “innovations” of episode 9, and episode 10 is likely to be an excruciating experience, but I disagree that the plot is crap in general.

  25. Os says:

    God I’m so confused. To watch or not to watch? I’ll watch only if I run out of things to watch and… unfortunately that’s looking more and more likely by the day.

    Oh and Baka-Raptor, I’ll see what I can do for you. ONLY if you come to Otakon and meet up with me and possibly Trollikit, which is looking more and more likely.

  26. Michael says:

    You know, I’m having doubts about watching Kure-nai now.

    But who cares, I still have Gundam 00 to watch.

  27. Baka-Raptor says:

    @issa-sa: Finally, someone who appreciates the brilliance of Ippatsu Kikimusume. You’d be surprised how few people know about it.

    @mt-i: Thank you, that’s the only decent counterargument anyone’s offered. I agree that shipping her from one prison to another would defeat the purpose of rescuing her. However, even assuming the goal of rescuing her was to give her an opportunity to experience the real world, there were still some very obvious, common-sense precautions she could’ve taken to drastically lower her risk of getting caught. Leaving her unsupervised and undisguised is just dumb. If you gave her a disguise and a competent chaperone, letting her outside might not be such a big deal.

    Once again, thank your for your insightful comment. My goal here isn’t (purely) to troll. I’m trying to make a legitimate point, and I appreciate well reasoned challenges to my arguments.

    @Os: That’s how I felt about School Days, which I ended up watching.

    I’ll probably come to Otakon. As for the details of the trip, I’ll figure them out later.

    @Michael: Get thee to a nunnery.

  28. thekungfukid says:

    Good thing i skipped this series then. And @ Michael: Gundam 00 starts out showing alot of promise and completely nose dives at the end. Waaaay over dramatic, the worst cast of gundam pilots ever. And everyone on that show “needs a beating “.

  29. korosora says:

    You make my sun shine.

  30. Os says:

    Dude? There was hesitation watching School Days? I ATE THAT UP. BREAKFAST, LUNCH, AND DINO-DINNER.

    and sweet. My most epic Otakon ever.

  31. Os says:

    Hm. And I just made an idiot of myself. I thought you were referring to Doki Doki School Hours. Ahhhh. Good times.

  32. [...] Nii-sama, must you sarcastically criticize every minor flaw/abnormality/inconsistency/cliché you see in any show? [...]

  33. [...] wrong, and you’ll excuse me if this is just a serious, too-long expansion of something that the dinosaurs have already trampled underfoot, is when the sweet slice-of-life exterior of the show gives way to [...]

  34. Baka-Raptor says:

    @Os: I forgive you. Doki Doki School Hours is easy watching.

  35. [...] Picking up with the same three categories from last time: [...]

  36. [...] – 7/12: I write the Kure-nai sucks [...]

  37. [...] how Kure-nai couldn’t stop fucking around? Shockingly, in the greatest redemption story mankind has ever witnessed, the author of [...]

  38. Gillz says:

    The anime TV show of Kure-nai sucks. However I really like the manga version a lot, except that it only comes out 1 chapter per month.
    I couldn’t keep watching the anime show for more than 1 or 2 episodes, but I can’t stop reading the manga chapter’s of kure-nai.

    P.S; loved your critiq ^.^

  39. Anonymous says:

    okay , this is your opinion , maybe you are right , maybe not . there are people who still like the anime , so you shouldn’t insult it like this. you should at least have some respect for the ones who created it and worked their asses just to make it happend. i personaly liked the anime .

    ✌ peace !☮

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