Will Eyeshield 21 make it to American TV?

An anime about football? What could possibly set this show apart from every other sports anime that follows the trials and tribulations of an unlikely hero joining a ragtag bunch of misfits who overcome their weaknesses as they aim to reach the championship game?

Answer: Hiruma, the devilish quarterback who singlehandedly manipulates the world through guns and blackmail. This guy may very well be the most badass character in the history of anime.

Eyeshield 21 would be perfect for Cartoon Network's afterschool or primetime lineup. What do they show these days, Ed, Edd, 'n Eddy? That's the stupidest shit ever. No wonder american kids suck at math. The only good original Cartoon Network cartoon was Johnny Bravo, and that was cancelled years ago. Fortunately, they're bringing Johnny Bravo back in live-action movie starring The Rock, so it'll undoubtedly kick ass.

As I was saying, Eyeshield 21 would be a great show to bring to America:

1. Football is America's favorite sport. Don't give me any of that "but baseball is America's national pastime" crap. Major League Baseball is plagued with scandals, the Yankees buy out whoever they want, and in the World Baseball Classic, the USA lost to Canada by allowing an inside the park homerun. How the hell does that happen? American basketball has already fallen in international competition, and we always sucked at hockey.

2. All the team names are spelled in perfect English. Whether it's the White Knights, Chameleons, Wild Gunmen, or Armadillos, all English that appears on the screen is spelled perfectly. Could they make dubbing this show any easier?

3. Guns. The only show that still respects the Right to Bear Arms doesn't air in America? That's got to change, and if those corrupt lobbyist sellouts at the NRA can find some way to profit from this, they'll definitely support it.

Unfortunately, a central element of the show might raise concern. Do we really want our children watching a show about a team named "The Deimon Devil Bats"? I do, but the far right might find it as objectionable as all those Harry Potter books that supposedly teach children to worship Satan. If the Tampa Bay Devil Rays actually end up dropping the "Devil" from their team name, this could mean bad news for Eyeshield 21. In any case, the networks should be able to get away with slapping a TV-Y7 rating on it.

It may be a while before Eyeshield 21 hits the air, but the manga is on sale and the anime isn't licensed yet, so I adamantly recommend checking it out.


Me: 5528 Team USA: 0