Attention women: you were not born with a PhD in psychology. Stop acting like you understand my thought process better than I do, because you don't, and it's annoying. I'm much better at detecting bullshit than you are at making it up.
Back when I was checking out places to stay for the summer, I was shown an apartment at the same time as some bitch. I could tell that she was interested in the place, mainly because she wouldn't stop kissing the owner's ass. Then as we were leaving the building, she thought that she could seal the deal by subtly convincing me that the place sucked:
I later found out that I hadn't kicked her ass thoroughly enough. Upon returning to my dorm room 20 minutes later, there was a message in my inbox stating that the bitch had already offered to take the apartment. On the bright side, I now know where she lives, so I can stop by and kick her ass anytime I feel like it.