New Year's Resolutions: 2008

1. Play more video games

For every minute I spend playing video games, I spend approximately 5 minutes yelling at people for sucking at video games.

Balancing this ratio requires either of two options:

A) Spend less time yelling.
B) Spend more time playing.

I prefer option B. All my yelling is necessary and proper, especially when my brother keeps screwing up against the combat adjudicators in Devil May Cry 3. UP, DOWN, CHARGE, COMBO I, COMBO II, and REPEAT HOW HARD IS THAT?!

Anyway, my goal is to start with Kingdom Hearts II, then Final Fantasy XII, and I'll take it from there...

2. Make more references to heretofore underrepresented anime

I've been called out for rarely/never mentioning Full Metal Alchemist and The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya. If I could leave out two of the most popular shows in recent anime history, just imagine how many less popular series I've been neglecting. For a while I really didn't care, but recently I've been inspired by a Legend of Galactic Heroes reference on Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei.

I've probably never said anything about Outlaw Star, Kenshin, Escaflowne, Hellsing, or Oh My Goddess! That's right, it's "Oh My Goddess!", not "Ah! My Goddess".

Half-translations are for pussies. Pick a side. It's either "Keroro Gunso" or "Sergeant Frog", not "Sergeant Keroro". It's either "Onegai Sensei" or "Please Teacher", because "Onegai Teacher" looks too much like "One Gay Teacher". Either "Mai Hime" or "My Hime" are acceptable (puns can work both ways), but "Mai Otome" is forbidden. Mai doesn't exist in My Otome; what's the point of sticking her name in the title?

3. Watch Neon Genesis Evangelion

Gotta watch it sometime. Or maybe I'll watch Rahxephon out of spite. Or maybe I'll finish watching Eureka Seven.

4. Learn to Draw

Pictionary brings out the worst in me. I'm still pissed off that my cousins couldn't recognize my badass sketch of Napoleon. Even after giving him a bicorn hat, a sword, three soldiers, and the Arc de Triomphe, they still couldn't figure it out, dumb bitches. I almost slapped them, but I realized that sending them back to India was punishment enough. India sucks. When my neighbor went to India, a beggar threw shit on his shoes and offered to clean it up for 10 rupees (about 25 cents). True story.

All seriousness aside, my artwork does have some room for improvement. I'm not yet capable of drawing something like this:


All images lifted from this Animesuki thread

Teresa rocks. A lot of guys might want her as a girlfriend. I'd want her to be my mom. Holy shit that would rule.

That's no disrespect to my real mother. It's just that I'm twice her size so she can't beat me as effectively as she did when I was younger. Mother Teresa could get the job done.

Nobody beats me when I screw up anymore. It sucks. Without beatings, how am I supposed to learn from my mistakes? Why would I ever clean my room or eat my vegetables? A new year's resolution? Forget it.


Teresa kicked 3591 orphans