Chrono Crusade: Nothing to do with Time Travel

"Holy shit! An anime about time travel! This is going to be the greatest series ever!".

Then I saw the first episode...

"Ok...not what I expected...but that's just the first episode..."

Five episodes later...

"That's it, I give up..."

Three years later...

"Hey, this series is actually pretty good..."

Before anybody bitches about technicalities, yes, the passage of time does get altered in some sense, but it's nothing sweet like jumping to the past and killing Lavos. Hell, they should make an anime about that. Instead, you get some show about religious prophecy that could be exploited to bring about the apocalypse. Once you get over the fact that it doesn't involve a time machine, it's actually pretty cool.

The show centers around Chrono, the tame but once terrifyingly powerful demon, and Rosette, the reckless gun-toting nun. Together they search for Rosette's brother, who disappeared during a mysterious childhood incident. As you might expect, the plot gets rather complex once it hits full swing, so instead of tossing spoilers around, I'll leave you to the intrinsic vagueness of my checklist:

Well developed minor characters
At least one subplot
Comical victimization
Recurring random character(s)
Badass mid-episode transitions
Soundtrack by Yuki Kajiura
Ending theme composed by Yuki Kajiura
Catchy dance sequence
Themes of Hatred/Suffering/Revenge
Hilarious gay dude
Stylish visual effects
Tournament Competition
Graphic violence
A character vaguely resembling myself
Pimp in a white suit
Disheveled journalist/photographer
Time Travel
Poetic Dubbing
Fight in a Ballroom/Casino/Cathedral/Theatre

This time around, I got my hands on the dubbed version. Chrono was voiced by Greg Ayres, the badass voice actor who did Goku from Saiyuki and the Pope from Trinity Blood. Also from Saiyuki, Rosette got Lirin's voice, and Father Remington got Homura's. As for the use of 20's slang, it was the bee's knees.

What sucks about this show? Well, other than the lack of time travel, there's this dirty old inventor who goes around fondling some of the nuns. Keep in mind, it's a Japanese show. Other than that, no major complaints.

4412 items were added to my checklist