Legend of the Galactic Heroes: Epic

When I use the word epic, I don’t cheapen it like everyone else on the internet:

Epic wasn’t meant to be some watered-down internet catch phrase. First of all, epic can only describe stories/accounts/tales/legends/recollections/etc…. The following things aren’t stories and therefore cannot be epic:

  • Maddox
  • Soundtracks by Yuki Kajiura
  • ShizNat fanart

Not epic, but awesome nonetheless

Epic was meant to describe the rare confluence of quantity and quality, not just anything that doesn’t suck. To be Epic, a show must at least contain:

  • Significant spatial scope
  • Significant temporal scope
  • Separable plots
  • Consistently high quality (absolutely no bullshit filler)
  • High stakes

Here are a few examples of shows that fall short of epic status:

  • DBZ: Too much bullshit filler
  • Naruto: Too much bullshit filler
  • Bleach: Too much bullshit filler
  • Kenshin: Too much bullshit filler
  • Inu Yasha: Too much bullshit filler
  • Death Note: Too short
  • The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya: Too short
  • Strawberry Panic: Too short (needs another season or two)
  • Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann: Too short, no separable plots (only a few simultaneous subplots)
  • Touch: Low stakes
  • Monster: More of a saga than an epic
  • Berserk: See Monster
  • Tsubasa Chronicle: Not bad, but far from elite

Legend of the Galacted Heroes has it all:

Well developed minor characters
Simultaneous subplots
Simultaneous plots
Unforeseeable plot twists
Comical victimization
Recurring random character(s)
Badass mid-episode transitions
Soundtrack by Yuki Kajiura
Catchy dance sequence
Comically awkward dance sequence
Themes of Hatred/Suffering/Revenge
Lesbians
Hilarious ambiguously gay dude
A bad poet
Stylish visual effects
Dinosaurs
Rivalry
Graphic violence
Character vaguely resembling myself
Failed confessions
Misunderstandings
Mangled German
Pimp in a White Suit
Time Travel
Woman who can’t cook
Catch phrases
Largest voice cast in anime history
Guy who never says anything
Self-parody

This show has over 100 named characters, all of whom kick ass. I’ve already profiled my hero, Yang Wenli. Then there’s this guy named Eisenach. He gets about three total minutes of screen time and never says anything. He snaps once for coffee and twice for alcohol. You don’t get quality characters like him anymore.

There’s a real man. Sideburns. Hair slicked back. No bullshit. Unlike modern anime characters, LoGH characters realized that bangs drooping over your eyes are a liability in battle. Even pretty boy Reinhard didn’t have bangs.

I could go on, but you get the message. Legend of the Galactic Heroes is probably the best anime I’ve ever seen. It’s unlicensed and fansubbed by Central-Fansubs, one of my favorite groups. Everything about this anime rules (except the graphics, but that’s because it’s old). Watch it.